Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Reflux and coughing and swelling ... oh my!

"Pregnancy suits you well". I keep reminding myself that this comment was made to me at one of my baby showers back in September, because if that same person saw me now, she may just decide against giving me that compliment. I used to consider myself to be quite a lady - good manners, correct posture, the whole kit and kaboodle. Well, that's hard to keep up with when you have a beach ball in your stomach! Let's see - what do I do and how do I look nowadays?
  1. Acid Reflux / Heartburn - This is just fabulous. I hadn't suffered ANY of this up until this point, so most pregnant women would probably say I am due for it, but that doesn't make it any more tolerable. Thankfully it only ails me at night and not throughout the day, but it has caused my body to make very interesting, yet gross, sounds at night as I am falling asleep. Kevin actually said the other night, "I want my old wife back". HA!
  2. Swelling - So you know how swollen ankles (or naturally big ankles, such as mine) can be called 'cankles' due to your calf and ankle just kind of merging without any womanly curves? Well, what do they call it when your CANKLES swell? Tell me, quick, because there HAS to be a name for what is attached to my leg from knee down. I personally call it humiliating. I mean, my cankles grew cankles!! I refuse to wear skirts, dresses, or anything that could possibly be blown by the wind to expose my elephant trunks. The ONLY silver lining to this is that the doctor said the water weight will melt off so fast - possibly before I leave the hospital - and my normal cankles will return. I actually think I'll be excited to see them.
  3. Burping - Also see "Acid Reflux / Heartburn", but this also occurs minutes after I drink any beverage of any kind - ALWAYS. Classy, I know.
  4. Snoring - Apparently I am breathing differently at night - maybe it is due to the decreased lung capacity nowadays, but I am officially a snorer. And a snorter. And I also do this whole "Huuuuuh?" thing just as I fall to sleep. It sounds like I am honestly asking a question and it wakes me up. Kevin gets quite the laugh from this one, as it has become a nightly ritual now. Sometimes at work I take naps on lunch. One of the beautiful things about Progressive is that we have these "Quiet Rooms" in one of the buildings. They are dark rooms with partitions up and each one has a nice leather recliner in it. No one can see you sleeping ... but they can hear you. This must be karma kicking my booty for complaining about snorers in there in the past. Now I don't snore in there, but I have woken myself up several times with the loud "Huuuuh?" noise. It is at that point that I act as though I am clearing my throat. I hope I have everyone fooled.
  5. My cough ... oh, that gross cough - Last week I came down with a cold, accompanied by a cough. I went to the doctor and was given some meds that were safe to take during pregnancy. They cleared up the other cold symptoms - runny nose, sore throat, etc ... but they've done nothing for this cough. And it isn't a normal cough. I sound like an 80 year old man who just finished off his second pack of Marlboro's for the day. Sometimes it hits me mid-sentence, but I try and fight it ... continuing to cough as I talk. Gross, right? Riley would be so proud of her mama ...

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